As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
Randomize
