I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
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