At a straight bar and poker face just came on...must...resist....urge to gay it up
Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
Semen is not good for contacts.
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
Randomize