Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
My dinner guests were so drunk they never realized that I inadvertantly put Frosted Mini Wheats on the salad instead of crutons.
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
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