...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
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