Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (616): View more from Michigan

  I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (616): I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does. http://tfl.nu/4jqf
  Replies (4) Good night (1181) Bad night (517)
• Favorite

  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (405): It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him. http://tfl.nu/10ee
  Replies (25) Good night (1429) Bad night (1625)
• Favorite

  (609): View more from New Jersey

  I haven't been this sober since birth.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (609): I haven't been this sober since birth. http://tfl.nu/qg8c
  Replies (15) Good night (1237) Bad night (2714)
• Favorite

  (650): View more from California

  areolas are like halos for boobs.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (650): areolas are like halos for boobs. http://tfl.nu/m02r
  Replies (41) Good night (5167) Bad night (1198)
• Favorite

  (661): View more from California

  I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (661): I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it http://tfl.nu/bivl
  Replies (15) Good night (1230) Bad night (6721)
• Favorite

  (731): View more from Tennessee

  Every fourth of July I get sentimental when I think back to the one where we drove around baked off our asses crashing multiple cookouts listening to Team America's "America, Fuck Yea" on repeat. I miss us.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (731): Every fourth of July I get sentimental when I think back to the one where we drove around baked off our asses crashing multiple cookouts listening to Team America's "America, Fuck Yea" on repeat. I miss us. http://tfl.nu/v50h
  Replies (6) Good night (2925) Bad night (736)
• Favorite

  (530): View more from California

  Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (530): Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it. http://tfl.nu/z6l9
  Replies (5) Good night (2189) Bad night (731)
• Favorite

  (253): View more from Washington

  Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (253): Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen? http://tfl.nu/9r46
  Replies (14) Good night (2648) Bad night (753)
• Favorite

  (218): View more from Minnesota

  You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (218): You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes. http://tfl.nu/x3hi
  Replies (8) Good night (1947) Bad night (581)
• Favorite

  (250): View more from British Columbia

  Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (250): Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo http://tfl.nu/a9s7
  Replies (6) Good night (1765) Bad night (888)
• Favorite

  (803): View more from South Carolina

  Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (803): Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class. http://tfl.nu/uw6v
  Replies (5) Good night (973) Bad night (1272)
• Favorite

  (512): View more from Texas

  He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (512): He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game http://tfl.nu/mfd2
  Replies (13) Good night (1905) Bad night (424)
• Favorite

  (774): View more from Massachusetts

  preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (774): preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts. http://tfl.nu/6ehv
  Replies (3) Good night (638) Bad night (281)
• Favorite

  (509): View more from Washington

  Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (509): Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it. http://tfl.nu/l3y2
  Replies (2) Good night (809) Bad night (416)
• Favorite

  (718): View more from New York

  GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (718): GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators? http://tfl.nu/ewjm
  Replies (6) Good night (653) Bad night (246)

Randomize