I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
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