She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
So drunk me is not subtlety trying to get her boss to cheat on her husband and have a lesbian affair with me. Sober me is ok with that.
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
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