New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
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