Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
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