big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
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