why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
Randomize
