She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
Randomize
