Yo dont text me then not text me
hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
I feel like that needs to be the last time i end a text with "fuck them i love tequila".
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
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