Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
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