so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
Randomize
