i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
Randomize
