i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
My sunday was babysitting three big, drunk, crying Swedes. Unless your day involved four or more giant drunk swedes I don't want to hear about it.
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize
