If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
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