But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
