we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
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