Alright folks.. i have made history - I just hit my 2nd PARKED car SOBER withing 6 months.. :*( wtf?!
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize