You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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