You totally narrated your dogs thoughts for 2 and a half hours last night, and I was enthralled. I didn't say one word, I just listened.
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
she told me i tasted like america
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
Randomize
