I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
I told her Billy Mays couldn't convince me to sleep with her
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
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