Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
Walking out of the bathroom and not knowing you have hand soap on the front of your pants so it looks like you blew a load on yourself really sets the tone for the rest of the week...
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
Never let him bartend when he's tripping. He sprinkled a ton of mexican shredded cheese over a jack and coke and called in a Monterey Jack Daniels.
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
Randomize
