no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
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