i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
Randomize
