Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
Never joke about your clitoris.
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
