come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
Put cigar in mouth backwards. Plz remind to check for scar in morning, can't feel it now. Screwdrivers are like morphine.
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
Randomize
