Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
i should start naming my morning wood
great idea but wrong number
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
Randomize
