i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
Randomize
