You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
He told me I look like a librarian today. I hope that means he has a librarian fetish or something
Disregard. He says he said I look "agrarian" today and just proceeded to compare me to Mumford and Sons. Fuck it, I'm going home and drinking
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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