Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
For future reference, when he drunkenly screams "YOUR MOTHER SUCKS COCKS IN HELL," he means that he's about to throw up. Invest in a bucket.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
