It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
You had me at "let me see your balls"
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
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