we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
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