these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
Can Purell be used as lube?
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
Randomize
