I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
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