Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
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