If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
and unfortunately for you, hallmark doesnt make a "sorry i was getting a blowie in the backseat of your car while you were driving, projectiled my jizz onto your hand, and caused you to crash" card
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
Fun fact: My predictive text now prompts "walrus" as the most likely word to follow "intoxicated"...
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
Randomize
