There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
Just want you to know I am def drunk enough to burn down your house. Don't worry I checked the stove like 6 times. I love grilled cheese
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
Randomize
