He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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