If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
I woke up to 30 angry texts and her Chihuahua in my room. Can you drop him off for me?
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
Themes for tonight: men who look like bill Gates but sing smash mouth songs. Women who's names are also food. Haircuts that DO NOT cover bald spots.
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
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