no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
Randomize