yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
I'm shaved like a Brazilian hooker right now.
I have the flu.
I don't give a shit
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
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