I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
I woke up in bed alone w 2 bite marks on my boob... Salt and pepper shakers In my purse along w a bottle of steak sauce.... The drunkasauraus has struck again
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
Randomize
