Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
Randomize
