I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
Randomize
