that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
Randomize
