You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
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