I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
Drunk dialed the ex last nigh; turns out I miss dialed. The stranger who answered played along and apologized for sleeping with my cousin. She sent me a txt this morning to let me know.
Kindest stranger ever. Marry that girl.
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
Randomize
